Peter's Battle
by Irondadiskindacool
Summary: Since Peter came back from Thanos' wrath, he hasn't been happy. What will May do to help? Tony? Or even Ned? Will they be able to help before it's too late? TW: Depression, self-harm/suicide
1. Chapter 1

TW: Depression, self-harm, suicide.

It has been weeks since Peter Parker came home from Thanos' wrath, but that didn't mean he was happy about it. _If you killed him the first time, you wouldn't be such a failure. You should've stayed dead._ He shook his head to attempt to get away from the voices in his head. Since school was cancelled for the rest of the year, he had more free time to be Spider-man, hang out with Ned, and visit Stark industries. His schedule wasn't as busy as it used to be, so he was able to catch some sleep that he lost. That didn't last long when his phone vibrated on the table beside his bed as he sighed and grabbed it.

 _May: I'm going to be extremely late, so I have stay in a hotel overnight. Stay safe. Call Tony if you need to, and I love you._

 _Peter: I love you, too. I might go over there if that's okay._

 _May: That's fine. I don't like it when you're by yourself._

 _Peter: Okay, okay, I get it. Talk to you soon. Bye._

He didn't have the chance to put the phone as he got more messages that sent his phone to going static.

 _Tony: Hey, kiddo, May texted me to tell you that you should come here. I'll send Happy now to pick you up._

 _Ned: What are you doing tonight._

 _Peter: I'm going to Tony's tonight, but I don't know about tomorrow though._

 _Ned: See if I can come by tomorrow then. I want to show this new thing I have._

 _Peter: Alright._

He gathered some clothes, a spiral notebook, and backpack as Happy pulled in. Rushing to the car, he slowed down to greet Happy. "Hey, what's up?"

"I'm glad to hear from you, kid," Happy said. "The boss wants to see you."

"I know." Peter got into the car and buckled his seatbelt.

"You hungry?" The driver asked. "Boss wanted me to make sure that you ate?"

"I'm not hungry."

"Everything okay, kid? You're usually hungry?"

"I'm okay, promise."

Tony was in his lab fixing suits when FR.I.D.A.Y. interrupted. "Sir, Peter has arrived. Should I tell him to come here?"

"No, I'm on my way," Tony replied. "Tell him that there's ice cream in the fridge."

"Happy informed me that Peter refused the offer to get food."

"That's weird." He sat up and went to the lounge where Peter was sitting. _The kid loves ice cream...something's not right._

Peter looked at him and turned away as his head was buried in his knees. "Hey, Tony."

Without hesitation, Tony sat next to him. "What's up, kiddo? Bad day?"

"Yeah, you can say that," Peter answered and took a deep breath. "Flashbacks—"

"Of what? Who?"

"Thanos, Vulture, seeing people disappear, Ben...everything," the kid began. "I mean it's not bad at the moment, but it's hard."

"I was like that when I first came back from Titan," Tony told him. "I mean, I couldn't sleep or anything in that matter. You disappeared and nothing could've been done about it. It was my fault, you know."

The kid shook his head. "If that was true, you'd be dead right now."

"Alright, alright," the older man chuckled. "What about sleep?"

"It's hard."

Peter felt the pull as Tony pulled him closer. "Want some food? Of course, you want some food. Besides, you can't refuse me."

"I guess you're right," the kid agreed. "I mean, I did come with you—"

"And I regret not taking you home myself," Tony interjected. "You're not going back up in space. I lost you once and that's something I can't handle going through again."

"I didn't mean to hurt you—"

"No, I hurt myself by not being able to do anything about it." Tony stopped the kid.

"I'm going to change in my room." The kid walked to his room.

Peter wasn't the type to be upset, but that's how he's been for weeks. Not a soul knows about his issues. He rolled up his sleeve, revealing old scars on his wrist. No one knew about that either. "F.R.I.D.A.Y, lock my door, please."

"Of course, Peter." The door locked as he sat on the bed as the kid held a piece of metal.

"Boss requested to enter the room."

"Y—yeah, hold on a minute." Peter said as he hid the metal and changed into his black hoodie.

A minute later, the door opened and Tony walked in. "Hey, buddy, what's taking so long?"

"Nothing," the kid lied and rolled down his sleeve. "It's nothing."

"Pete."

"Yeah?"

He sat by him. "Everything okay at home?"

The kid nodded. "It's great. May is amazing and well," he said. "We're going to Ned's tomorrow. Why?"

"I'm just wondering because you haven't been yourself lately."

The kid shrugged. "It's okay—"

Tony rolled the kid's sleeve without the kid knowing. Well, until Peter jerked.

"Peter?"

"I got to go, I'll see you—"

"Sit down, kiddo," Tony said with a gentle voice. "How long has this been going on?"

Peter looked away from him and looked at the window. "Since I came back.," he whispered, trying to keep the tears from falling. "I mean, I'm matching the inside with the outside. Besides, those are old."

"May has to know, and I won't let you exclude her from this." Tony explained.

"Tony—"

"This is serious, Pete." He pulled him into a hug. The fact that he went through the same thing made it worse.

"I'm going to get some sleep after I eat."

Tony nodded. "I'll be waiting." He walked out and picked up his phone. "Play music in his room for a few minutes." He had a phone call to make.

He dialed May's number, hoping that she would answer.

"Hello." May answered from the other line.

"Hey, it's Tony," he said and sat down. "You got a minute?"

"I do, why?"

"Have you been looking through Pete's room?"

"No, why?"

He let out a sigh. "I'm sorry that I have to tell you this—"

"Where is he?! I swear, if you had him killed—"

"No, it's that he's been," he paused to take a deep breath. _Here it goes._ "He's been hurting himself."

"Wait, what? What are you talking about?"

"He has self-inflicted scars on his wrist, May."

Silence took over for what felt like forever. "Why didn't I catch this?" May asked.

"It's not your fault, I promise."

"I'm on my way right now," she said with worry. "Keep an eye on him. Hell, watch some Pixar movie that I'm sure will make him tear up."

"Will do, see you in a bit."

 _Pete's going to kill me…_


	2. Trust gone wrong

May Parker was a huge instrument in Peter's life. After all, she's the only family member he has left. She loved Peter like a son. She walked into the tower and went to Happy. "Where are they?" She asked him with worry. Happy nodded and took her to the kitchen, where Tony and Peter were eating pizza. Peter was laughing at some-likely stupid-jokes from Tony. Of course, it didn't take long until he saw his aunt standing at the door. "Hey, May," he said. "You got done earlier than expected, huh?"

"Yeah, we can say that," May answered and turned to Tony. "Hey, Tony." She walked over and sat next to Peter.

"Hey, Pete," Tony said. "Let's sit on the couch really quick, okay?"

"Sure, okay." The kid followed them to the couches and sat next to his aunt.

"Honey, I need to know what's going on." She said.

"I'm fine, really, I'm just really tired—"

"I know about it."

"Wait, what do you mean by—" It dawned on him that Tony called her as he turned to him. "You called her?"

"Kid, I had to," Tony explained. "I'm worried, too—"

"No, you didn't have to." Peter claimed and stood up.

"Honey—"

The kid stepped to the balcony. "No, no…"

May tried following him, but he'd already activated his suit. "Pete, please…"

"I need to get out of here." He said and swung away with his webs.

"I don't know what happened," May said and broke down. "Something's happening, and I don't know how to fix it."

Tony stood next to her. "We have to find him."

Peter swung from building to building as anger was built inside him. _You're so stupid, Parker! What the fuck is wrong with you?_ He wanted a place to hide but couldn't find one.

 _Until…._

 _The bridge._

He swooped down to the bottom where no one could find him and changed into his normal clothes. Sitting against the cold pavement, he let out a cry. One painful cry. He was exhausted from everything. Taking the piece of metal, he took a deep breath and dragged it across his wrist without second guessing. That continued for quite some time until a familiar voice called his name.

"Peter, Peter is that you?" A male voice asked.

Ned. _Shit._

"It's fine—"

"Come with me, okay? This isn't healthy!"

"Ned, I'm fine."

"May and Mr. Stark called several police stations, Pete. I'm telling you they're worried sick. Stark's getting ready to have an anxiety attack, and his friend isn't there to stop it."

Peter sighed.

"I know that you're going through a lot but come with me. I'm begging you."

Peter agreed and stood up as his friend walked to him. "I can't do this, Ned." He began to bawl.

His friend pulled him into a hug. "I'm here for you, okay? It's going to be okay." He took Peter to the car that his mom drove as he texted May and Tony in the group chat.

 _Ned: I got him, he's not okay though. He has new scars on him._

 _May: Where did you find him?_

 _Ned: Under a bridge._

 _Tony: Where are you taking him?_

 _Ned: His apartment. My mom says that I should stay with him. It's safe to go back to your job stay if you'd like._

 _May: Thank you so much. He had me so worried._

 _Tony: Have him text me, please._

"I trusted him," Peter said softly. "I did."

"I know, but it's not healthy to keep these things hidden." Ned said and placed a hand on his shoulder.


	3. Piece by Piece

Peter wanted to be alone, but Ned refused to let him be. **Would you after finding your friend hurting himself or herself?** Ned knew better than to leave him alone while May was working as no one knew what Peter would do. It was clear that Peter was depressed as it was written all over his face.

"Ned, I'm fine," Peter protested. "You can go home."

"No, I can't," his friend said. "You're scaring me. In fact, you're scaring everyone."

"Define everyone."

"Mr. Stark called me while having an anxiety attack because you left with no warning."

Peter sighed and covered his face with his hands. "Why though?"

"He loves you more than he loves himself," Ned explained and tok a deep breath. "When he came back, he wasn't even himself. He drank and drank. How do I know that? He called May in literal tears, sobbing because he lost you. He explained everything."

"What are you saying?" Peter asked softly. He looked at Ned and waited for answer.

"Peter, I'm not trying to scare you or anything but if he loses you again, he won't come back from that. Knowing his history, he would go back to alcohol or worse."

"What's worse?"

Ned swallowed his pride and took a deep breath. "I can't say..."

"Why?"

"He made me promise that I wouldn't…" Ned noticed his friend starting to cry.

"I—I wasn't trying to hurt anyone," Peter cried and revealed both of his stained wrist. "This…this tells me that I'm alive, you know?"

"It's not healthy, bud."

Peter sighed and stood up. "I got to go…"

"Actually, Mr. Stark is on his way. He wants to talk to you about everything,"

 _Fuck._

Tony walked into the Parker's apartment and locked the door behind him. "Hey, Pete, come out here. I just want to talk." He looked around the place for a sign of him. He grew worried. "Pete, please."

Suddenly, he heard a door open and Peter came out. He sat on the couch as he continued to avoid eye contact.

"I know you're upset with me and I get it, but you don't understand because—"

"…Because I'm just a kid," Peter interjected. 'I know. It's just…I trusted you."

Tony sat next to the boy and pulled him into a hug. "I know…trust me, but I had no other choice. I'm not going to erase her from your life. She's been here for you longer than I have and not telling her is like betraying the promise I made."

"What promise?"

"I promised that I would make sure that you are safe physically, emotionally, and mentally. That's not only I made to her, but it's a promise that I made to myself," Tony sighed and pulled away, looking down. "…Because if something happened to you again, I won't be able to come back from that. I was so close to…"

Peter looked down and gulped. "Close to what?"

"I made a deal with myself that if I failed to get you back and I lived, I would…"

"You would kill yourself?"

The older man nodded and sighed. "I shouldn't even be talking about this with you. But knowing that you're suffering and not knowing what to do sucks. You know that I love you with all my heart."

Peter nodded. "It tells me that I'm alive…"

"What does?"

"It's nothing, Tony." The kid said and scooted away.

The older man tried to hold his hand, but a jerk bolted out. "You know that you can tell me anything, right?"

"You'll judge me." The kid said as his voice broke. Seeing Peter cry would break anyone's heart.

"No, no, no I won't."

The kid sighed. "If you say so." He rolled up his sleeves as new mark showed.

"Hey, let's get the first aid kit and get this fixed up, and we can watch movies on the couch until we fall asleep. Is that okay?"

"Okay, I'll call May I guess."

The older man ruffled the kid's hair and walked away as Peter dialed the number.

"May…No, I'm not alone. Ned and Tony are here…okay, I got it. I'm not hungry…look, I'm fine, okay? I love you, too. Bye." He threw the phone across the couch.

"Pete, is it okay if I stay?" Ned asked.

Before he could answer, Tony came back. "Yay, it's a party!"

"Okay, I'm taking that as a yes.

A few minutes into the movie, Tony was looking over to Peter to make sure he's doing okay. He knew that Ned was there, but it didn't feel right leaving when he knew what Peter can do. Ned was right, he did love the kid like a son.

"Mr. Stark," Ned called. "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

Tony nodded and left the room since Peter was sleeping, and they went to Peter's room. "Yeah, what's up?"

"I don't how to help him," Ned said and sighed. "I want to, but I don't know how I can."

"Support him through this," Tony said. "Well, try to. He's one of the purest kids in the world, you know that."

"Yeah, I mean, he doesn't even fight back in school. I do the fighting. He tried before, but it didn't go so well…"

They should've whispered as Peter woke up to their conversation and heard every word.

"…Can I be honest?" Ned continued with a question.

"Sure." Tony said.

"I don't know if I can help him, you know? I have friends and this sounds horrible, but he's kind of ruining it for everyone else…"

Peter went by the door and sighed. He knew it was no use to try to explain, so he just went to May's room and laid down on her bed. The walls were paper thin so every word that was being said wouldn't go unnoticed especially when his senses are up to eleven.

"I mean, he's my best friend and he's a great human-being, but I don't know if I can be around him." Ned finished.

"Ned, he needs you. Don't do this to him, okay?"


End file.
